If you are considering counselling, you may be wondering what will actually happen in the first session. This might be your first experience of therapy, or you may have worked with a counsellor before. Either way, every counsellor is different and will have their own way of working.

This post gives you a sense of what a first counselling session with me might look like, from the practical details we need to cover to beginning to explore what has brought you to counselling.

Before we meet, I will send you a working agreement by email. This explains some of the practical arrangements, including confidentiality and its limits, payment, and what happens if you need to cancel a session.

When you arrive, I will ask you to complete a short form with details such as your address, GP and who I could contact in an emergency. I will also offer you some water and give you a little time to settle in.

We will briefly go over the most important parts of the working agreement together, and you can ask any questions you have. These details matter, but I do not want your first session to be taken up with contracts and paperwork.

Most of our 50 minutes will be about beginning to get to know you. There is no right way to begin, and simply taking that first step can require a great deal of courage.

I may ask what has brought you to counselling, what you would like to work on and what you hope might feel different as a result. You do not need to arrive with clear answers. Some people know exactly why they have come. Others simply know that something does not feel right, or that they are finding it harder to cope in the way they usually would.

You can take things at your own pace and share as much or as little as feels comfortable. You do not need to tell me everything in the first session, and there is no expectation that you begin with the most difficult or painful parts of your story.

Sometimes things come tumbling out. You may feel emotional, move between different parts of your story, or find yourself saying things you have not said out loud before. At other times, it can take a while to find the words or to feel comfortable enough to share more. Both are completely understandable.

For some people, the first session is mainly about having space to let things out to someone who does not already know them and who is there to listen without judgement. As counselling continues, and when you feel ready, we may begin to look at your experiences from different angles and notice patterns that can be difficult to see when you are in the middle of them.

The first session is not about telling me everything or knowing exactly where counselling will lead. It is a chance for us to begin getting to know one another, to see how it feels to talk together and to start exploring what you might need from counselling.